Senna, across the finishing line.

*Written in 2019*

​"And suddenly I realized that I was no longer driving the car consciously. I was driving it by a kind of instinct, only I was in a different dimension." - Senna.

He did drive into a different dimension, this icon. A ruthless devil behind the wheel and a humble, caring angel on foot, he was a person with charm unparalleled to any other racing driver at his time.

No one tried harder or pushed himself further, nor did anyone drive into extremes to which only the greatest drivers go to only dance on the edge. Ayrton Senna endlessly sought to extend his limits, to go faster than himself, a quest that ultimately made him a martyr but did not diminish his mystique.

"You will never know the feeling of a driver when winning a race. The helmet hides feelings that cannot be understood." - Senna.

You will find a few F1 drivers better than him on paper, but if you watched him race, you would know what was different about him.

He made his debut with Toleman in 1984. At Monaco (a race he would go on to win six times), his sensational second to Alain Prost's McLaren, in torrential rain, was confirmation of a wet weather master, that would take the sport by storm.

Have a look at his one lap around the track with a screaming Honda V10 engine with a manual gearbox. 55 seconds ahead of the 2nd car which was his teammate in a similar car in Monaco. His famous kamikaze qualifying laps were intense to watch. Especially the ones at Monaco. Racers would give way to him during qualifying, that was the presence he had on the track. Have a look at this one.

At McLaren, where he went in 1988 and stayed for six seasons, he won 35 races and three world championships. In 1988, when McLaren-Honda won 15 of the 16 races, Senna beat his teammate Alain Prost eight wins to seven to take his first driving title. Thereafter, two of the greatest drivers became protagonists in one of the most infamous feuds. In 1989 Prost took the title by taking Senna out at the Suzuka chicane. In 1990 Senna exacted revenge at Suzuka's first corner, winning his second championship by taking out Prost's Ferrari at Suzuka's first corner. Senna's third title, in 1991, was straightforward as his domination as a driver became even more pronounced, as did his obsession with becoming better still. Some of his greatest performances came in his final year with McLaren, following which he moved to Williams for the ill-fated 1994 season.

''Being second is to be the first of the ones who lose.'' - Senna

When he spoke with his warm brown eyes, sparkling and his voice brimming with intensity, his charm was spellbinding. At his press conferences, you could hear a pin drop as he spoke with such hypnotic effect. Everyone marveled at how he put so much of himself, his very soul, into everything he did, not just his driving but into life itself.

He drove like a man possessed - some thought by demons. His ruthless ambition provoked condemnation from critics, among them, Prost who accused him of caring more about winning than living. When Senna revealed he had discovered religion, Prost and others suggested he was a dangerous madman who thought God was his co-pilot.

Even Senna confessed he occasionally went too far, he said he was acutely aware of his own mortality and used fear to control the extent of the boundaries he felt compelled to explore. Indeed, he regarded racing as a metaphor for life and he used driving as a means of self-discovery.

"For me, this research is fascinating. Every time I push, I find something more, again and again. But there is a contradiction. The same moment that you become the fastest, you are enormously fragile. Because in a split-second, it can be gone. All of it. These two extremes contribute to knowing yourself, deeper and deeper." - Senna

His self-absorption did not preclude deep feelings for humanity and he despaired over the world's ills. He loved children and gave millions of his personal fortune (estimated at $400 million when he died) to help provide a better future for the underprivileged in Brazil. Early in 1994 he spoke about his own future.

"I want to live fully, very intensely. I would never want to live partially, suffering from illness or injury. If I ever happen to have an accident that eventually costs my life, I hope it happens in one instant." - Senna

And so it did, on May 1, 1994, in the San Marino Grand Prix at Imola, where his race-leading Williams inexplicably speared off the Imola track and hit the concrete wall at Tamburello corner. Millions saw it happen on television, the world mourned his passing and his state funeral in Sao Paulo was attended by many members of the shocked Formula One community. Among the several drivers escorting the coffin was Alain Prost. Among the sad mourners was Frank Williams, who said: "Ayrton was no ordinary person. He was actually a greater man out of the car than in it." Yes, he was. Ironically, he was one of the only drivers who cared for other drivers. This was proven many times. An instance where he climbed out of his own race car during the race, running through the track to help a fellow driver out of his wreckage. The day before Senna crashed, Roland Ratzenberger, a fellow friend of his he just met a day before, had lost his life during practice. Senna deeply mourned the Austrian driver. After Senna's crash, the officials found an Austrian flag in the wreckage which Senna planned to wave once he won the race.

"I don't know driving in another way which isn't risky. Each one has to improve himself. Each driver has its limit. My limit is a little bit further than other's." - Senna.

Today, 1st May 2019, it's been 25 years since this legend left planet Earth. He will always remain the best driver, human, and inspiration for me.